DNC

No, nothing to do with politics..  This stands for DO NOT CATHETERIZE!

After spending roughly 48 hours with my son who had a catheter in, I'm all set thanks. Based on what I just had to do over the past 2 days, if it's necessary just forget it.

He did not move from my bed for almost 2 days.  I had to pick him up every hour to empty the catheter so that it did not flow backwards. Additionally, he was upstairs in my bedroom while I was downstairs trying to do work. This obviously presented a problem.

I had what I thought was a genius idea of giving him a bell (small Liberty Bell we had) that he could ring if he needed me. His voice was still very hoarse from the breathing tube so this would work perfectly. I recall from my childhood there was a cartoon with the same premise. Someone who was sick was given a bell to use to signal when they needed something. Then the bell would ring and the person would come upstairs only to find their kitten had gotten hold of the bell and was playing with it like a ball of yarn. We don't have a kitten, but it was something like that. I found him one time just playing with it and not needing anything. Thankfully his voice got better as the day went on so the bell wasn't as necessary.

But still every hour, if I wasn't going up to change the show, movie or bring him food/drink, it was upstairs to empty the catheter tube. Then, overnight he slept with me in my bed where every 2-3 hours I had to do the same thing. Plus, I had to make sure that in his sleep he was not rolling over on either side so the catheter would stay in place. Needless to say, I have not slept much since Monday.

Then finally Wednesday came and the doctors appointment to have it removed.  He has had a bladder tube before (a tube inserted directly into the bladder that diverts the flow from the urethra and out a tube so it allows the urethra to heal) and my role was to hold his torso down (mostly his arms) and make sure he is as calm as possible and not flailing his arms around.  I had to do that twice and it was not fun. But it was fairly quick so it wasn't too bad. (FYI, the bladder tube also naturally causes bladder spasms. At one point I had to stand in the middle of the living room and hold him in the same position for two hours because it was the only position he could be in where it didn't hurt). Yep, the things we do.

This however was different.  After keeping his arms down for a few minutes and after he screamed his face off right in mine, I told him not to worry they were almost done, only to hear the nurse say that they hadn't even started yet.  UGH! It got to the point where he was spitting up (kind of like the spittle that sometimes leaks out of your mouth when you sleep with your mouth open), except in a much bigger puddle accompanied by screams of pain. Yeah, good times. By the end, he and I were both literally sweating. His head was drenched and I needed to take off my sweatshirt and was having trouble breathing.  Remember, this is a kid on HGH. You know, the thing athletes take to make them stronger? Let me tell you, it really does work.

But once he calmed down and was home, he was fine. So he's resting comfortably on the couch now watching Power Rangers and we're doing our best to keep him limited in his activity. No running, jumping, straddling or any quick or sudden movements for 10 days. Yeah, have you met the Kraken?

7th Time's a Charm?

So as I sit here in our personal section (or at least it seems that way) of the waiting area of Boston Children's Hospital (again), I'm reminded of the first time I sat here. It was exactly 5 years ago to the day and we were waiting anxiously to hear from the doctor about how the heart surgery had gone. We had gotten the news about 48 hours prior (as we were about to take him home for the third time) that Douglas's aorta narrowing had gotten worse. The two previous attempts to take him home were thwarted by last minute spikes in blood pressure (In hindsight, probably a good thing). It stemmed from an improper closing of the PDA valve after birth. This caused a narrowing in his aorta making it extremely hard for the blood to flow. Because he was so small, probably only about 5 pounds or so at this point, his heart was working overtime just to pump the blood normally but was working double overtime because of the narrowing. This was causing his blood pressure to spike even more. They told us if they did not operate to remove the blockage in 72 hours, his heart would literally explode.

Now you would think that news like this would be so devastating to new parents that they would break down uncontrollably and cry. But after the last 10 weeks of what we and the boys had been through, this was pretty much par for the course (and should have been a sign of things to come). Long story short, the procedure went flawlessly, his blood pressure is stellar and the annual EKG's have all been fun actually since he gets to play with all the stickers on his body.

But I've come to the realization that the old saying is true: That which doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Because this kid is the strongest 5 year old I know and if he can get through all of this in his first 5+ years of life, he can get through anything that life will throw at him. I love him more than he'll ever know.

The Day

For anyone who knows me, I have pretty much been the same weight since I graduated college..  There was this uptick of about 10 pounds my senior year from 150 to 160, but I honestly have no idea why.. Must have just been a fluke; you know, one of those things..

Anyway, I've been hovering around 150 for the better part of almost 15 years now (ugh, has it really been almost 15 years since I graduated college?) and I've been able to eat pretty much anything I wanted.. It's a gift you know?  It's like I can't control it. (Anyone who's seen The Girl Next Door knows that line). My metabolism, thanks to my grandfather, helped me out with that..  Truth be told, I've always been pretty active, but I've slowed down a bit in recent years.. With a full time job and the Twinado, my nights of playing indoor soccer have disappeared and my days of pick up hoop games with friends have waned into non-existence. Don't get me wrong, chasing the boys around, playing at the park with them or even taking the dog for a walk is good exercise, just not to the level I'm used to.

However I had an epiphany recently, or maybe it was a hallucination from the excruciating pain I was feeling while enduring my third kidney stone in the last 8 years.. I have no idea why God picked me to have these, but oh I am so thankful!! I used to think that you're never given anything you can't handle (see previous blogs), but seriously this isn't even funny.  My first one was in 2004 when living in Smallbany, NY. I would write a blog about that, but we weren't even there long enough for anything interesting to happen.. Oh, except for all of our belongings being stolen by the movers, but that's another blog for another day I guess..

It was in the middle of the night and it was pain unlike I had ever experienced before.. I had never really had any type of pain experience like that so I wasn't sure what to expect.  Of course, Amy wasn't feeling well that night so she had taken the red devil (NyQuil) so she could sleep.  So there she is in her NyQuil coma and I am writhing around in pain on the floor thinking something is going to burst through my side like in Alien (yes, I know, that was his chest but your kidney's aren't in your chest now are they?) 

Thankfully my wailing eventually woke her with obviously no clue as to what was happening.  Not knowing the area too well, or really what was going on, 911 was the best course of action.  While the ambulance is on its way I thought I could make it to the door.  It is the middle of the night, in February, in Albany so it's not exactly balmy out. Somehow I have clothes on when the paramedics arrive.  I thought I could crawl the length of the hallway from our bedroom in the back of the apartment to the front door, which in retrospect isn't that long, but seemed like one of those never-ending hallways.  Well, I didn't make it.. I collapsed somewhere between the end of our bedroom and the beginning of the kitchen, which was probably a total of 5 feet.  They had to put me on one of those chairs that keeps you in a tuck position because the pain of having to straighten my body was unbearable. Amy followed along in her car while the ambulance drove to the hospital which was about 5-10 minutes away. I do remember them hooking me up to the IV and giving me morphine for the pain.  I remember them saying " OK 5 cc's of morphine" and administering it.  Then they ask you, if you've never been in an ER or ambulance for a pain-related emergency, "describe the pain from 1-10?"  So I said 20!  OK, I'll let you in on a little secret here.. I don't deal with pain well.. I mean, a cut on my finger, or s stub on the toe, big deal.. but real, actual pain?  Nope..  So they gave me another 5 cc's of morphine. After a minute or two, they asked me again and I think I said 15.  So yes, they gave me 5 more cc's of morphine and then I was floating.  I was done. No more pain.  No more anything really..  The relief was the best thing I had ever felt..  Until it wore off at some point in the hospital so they gave me a prescription for Vicodin. While at CVS filling my prescription for Vicodin, the pharmacist asked me what it was for as it was heavy medication.  I told her it was for a kidney stone and she said, and I quote" I have had 3 children by vaginal birth and I have had 1 kidney stone.  I would gladly have 3 more children by vaginal birth than have another kidney stone." Fan-tas-tic.  Now make with the Vicodin before the one I took wears of..  

Unfortunately, I did not pass it so I had to sit on the couch for a few days and in between popping Vicodin drink those 24 oz sport bottles of Poland Spring and pee every 5 minutes into a strainer to hopefully pass a stone that was about half the size of a grain of rice, if that..  Tons of fun let me tell you..

The second one, of course in the middle of the night again was not as bad as before the ambulance even arrived I was already starting to feel better.. It didn't mean I wasn't in pain and didn't gladly accept the morphine they were giving me, it just didn't hurt as much for as long the second time. However, circumstances had changed because we had 2 very young children and in the middle of the night, it just wasn't going to be possible to have Amy and the boys follow me.  So after I was released, the ER called me a cab and yes, I took a cab home from the hospital. Only, I didn't have any money and had to plead with the guy to take me home explaining my situation.  I was praying that we had some cash at home to give him and thankfully, we had just enough.  Sorry dude, no tip this time.. Maybe next time..

And yes, there was a next time.. For the kidney stone, not the cab thankfully..  But of course, the middle of the night (there has to be something to this) and there it is again.. Agony.. After already having had two of them, I knew exactly what the pain was. So we pack up the boys in the car and drive to the ER. Toridal and Dilaudid this time around, which did the trick.. We were only there for a few hours and still was able to get a few more hours sleep on Saturday morning..  However, we were planning on going with some friends to Davis Farmland which had already been postponed once for the weather.  It was the boys' birthday weekend and I didn't want to miss it.  So I perc'd up and it was pretty fun actually.. 

 
So, the real point of this blog (if you're still reading) is that for the first time in my life, I'm on a diet.Well, it's not really a diet I guess, just trying to cut sodium.  You would not believe the sodium content in some things.. I'm not saying that too much sodium will kill you, but there are lots of things that we eat that can have lasting effects on our health  I'm not here to preach don't worry.  But my point is in addition to the fact I have no want at all to relive the pain of another kidney stone, I do have the want to see my sons grow up. . These last 5 years have totally changed me. But it doesn't have to be just kids. It can be parents, grandparents, siblings, grandchildren, whomever.  It doesn't matter who as long as it's someone. I'm not saying don't enjoy life, I'm just saying make sure you make it last a long time. And while I don't want to go too crazy, I will if I have to.  Because I think it's worth it.