So when I was 12 my parents built a house on the other side of town and we moved. But it wasn't just any ordinary move. To be honest, I really don't even remember packing anything. I don't remember packing up my clothes in bags or suitcases. I don't remember going through my toys seeing what I could donate, take with me or throw out. I really don't remember the house being in disarray from all the boxes, etc.
But what I do remember is that I left my old house to go to school on one school bus and came home to my new house on another school bus. So there I am, walking to the bus stop periodically looking back to the only home I'd ever known knowing I'd never step foot in that house again. (back then they actually had a designated bus stop where kids in the neighborhood would all congregate instead of everyone being picked up at the end of their driveway, but I digress)
The best thing though was that when I was 10 we went to Florida and Cape Canaveral. I was very much into space and I got a Space Shuttle sticker. I put it on my bedroom door as kids tend to do. However, when we sold the house, I tried to scrape it off. Yeah, not so much.. I went to school with the girl whose parents bought the house. She got my room and yelled at me because now she had this partially scratched off space shuttle sticker on her door.. She never spoke to me again. Oh well.
Back to the story. It was really weird. It's still weird to this day to be honest. However it got even weirder, I think when the same type of scenario happened recently. We sold our townhouse and as I'm driving the Twinado to school that last day I reminded them, as I had every day for the previous month that we were going to a different house. We took pictures on the front steps of the house before we left and once we got in the car and went to school, they had already forgotten all about it. They were picked up after school and it was no different than any other day, except they didn't go back to their old house, they went to the new one.
It really is amazing to watch the kids and what phases them and what doesn't. I didn't push, I didn't make a big deal out of it. I just let them deal with it in their own way, which turned out not to be a big deal at all..
Rock Fists
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Monday, July 1, 2013
Monday, June 24, 2013
1st Day of Camp
So today was the first day of camp. Since the 1st week of January, 2008 the Twinado has always gone to the same daycare a minimum of 3 times a week, sometimes even 4. During the summer it turns into a de facto camp, but it's limited to certain activities on a smaller scale due to space. But since our move, the hour and a half drive (each way plus another 45 each way to and from work) 3 times a week to bring them to school for the past 5 weeks has been a major strain on my car and my stress level.
It is now almost 5 1/2 years later and today, they start camp. Much closer to the house. The Twinado definitely inherited my sleeping habits (thankfully) but due to that they aren't the easiest to get up in the morning. Not so today. Right out of bed and dressed and downstairs for breakfast. After breakfast, upstairs to brush their teeth and backpacks on. Normally this would be fantastic, but it was only 720a and the bus wasn't coming until 810a! However, as I always tell them "early is on time, on time is late and late is unacceptable." So I will never say being ready 50 minutes early is a bad thing (especially when we have Kindergarten coming in the fall). Oy, seriously?
As we rocked out to a little ACDC and Incubus while waiting for the bus, I had to make sure they had sunscreen on before getting on the bus. So I brought them out around 8a to spray them down. Then, a few minutes after finishing, the bus came and they were so excited!! Ever since they learned what a yellow school bus was, they have wanted to go on one. It was literally a dream come true for them.
Douglas, being the little guy he is needed some help reaching the first step of the bus. But the bus counselors were great and helped him on and got them to their seats. As we're waiting for the bus to leave, a mother who was there sending her son off asked me if they were twins and I said yes.. First time at camp? Yes.. She also admitted they were watching me spray the boys down and were flabbergasted at how jacked Douglas was (her word, not mine). Yeah well, HGH will do that to a kid, but I just said thanks.. Also not the first time that word has been used to describe him.
She also said her son was curious about the sunscreen because after rubbing it in on their heads (gotta protect the top of the head if there is no hat), ears and face, my hands were going to be all sticky and gross. He was interested to know what I would do and that was when I busted out the bottle of water and shirt from my car to wash them off.. This is not my first rodeo, kid.. I got this shit down..
Of course the Twinado was not on the bus for more than 5 minutes when the bus counselor had to come off and talk to me. Here's how the conversation went:
Bus Counselor: "So you're the twins' dad right?
Me: "Yes".
Bus Counselor: "I asked them if they knew what group they were in and they said no". (Even though we went over it this morning). "So I asked them if they thought their daddy would know and I just got a shoulder shrug".
Me: "Poodles. They're in Poodles."
Bus Counselor: "OK, thanks!"
As the bus pulled away and I'm dreading my still hour long commute, I'm reminded of where they started from 5 and a half years ago when I dropped them off at daycare for the first time and where they are today. It's amazing and exciting and man I hope the the camp is still standing by the end of the week.
It is now almost 5 1/2 years later and today, they start camp. Much closer to the house. The Twinado definitely inherited my sleeping habits (thankfully) but due to that they aren't the easiest to get up in the morning. Not so today. Right out of bed and dressed and downstairs for breakfast. After breakfast, upstairs to brush their teeth and backpacks on. Normally this would be fantastic, but it was only 720a and the bus wasn't coming until 810a! However, as I always tell them "early is on time, on time is late and late is unacceptable." So I will never say being ready 50 minutes early is a bad thing (especially when we have Kindergarten coming in the fall). Oy, seriously?
As we rocked out to a little ACDC and Incubus while waiting for the bus, I had to make sure they had sunscreen on before getting on the bus. So I brought them out around 8a to spray them down. Then, a few minutes after finishing, the bus came and they were so excited!! Ever since they learned what a yellow school bus was, they have wanted to go on one. It was literally a dream come true for them.
Douglas, being the little guy he is needed some help reaching the first step of the bus. But the bus counselors were great and helped him on and got them to their seats. As we're waiting for the bus to leave, a mother who was there sending her son off asked me if they were twins and I said yes.. First time at camp? Yes.. She also admitted they were watching me spray the boys down and were flabbergasted at how jacked Douglas was (her word, not mine). Yeah well, HGH will do that to a kid, but I just said thanks.. Also not the first time that word has been used to describe him.
She also said her son was curious about the sunscreen because after rubbing it in on their heads (gotta protect the top of the head if there is no hat), ears and face, my hands were going to be all sticky and gross. He was interested to know what I would do and that was when I busted out the bottle of water and shirt from my car to wash them off.. This is not my first rodeo, kid.. I got this shit down..
Of course the Twinado was not on the bus for more than 5 minutes when the bus counselor had to come off and talk to me. Here's how the conversation went:
Bus Counselor: "So you're the twins' dad right?
Me: "Yes".
Bus Counselor: "I asked them if they knew what group they were in and they said no". (Even though we went over it this morning). "So I asked them if they thought their daddy would know and I just got a shoulder shrug".
Me: "Poodles. They're in Poodles."
Bus Counselor: "OK, thanks!"
As the bus pulled away and I'm dreading my still hour long commute, I'm reminded of where they started from 5 and a half years ago when I dropped them off at daycare for the first time and where they are today. It's amazing and exciting and man I hope the the camp is still standing by the end of the week.
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Where Were You
There are those moments for all of us. Some are personal and some are local, national and even global.
For people who remember, they know where they were when JFK was shot. (Way before my time). They know where they were when the Challenger exploded. (I was in my classroom having recess because my teacher for whatever reason wouldn't let us watch. Another student barged in and told us what happened). They know where they were when 9/11 happened. (I was at work and when told that a plane had hit the WTC, I asked NY or Boston because I knew my mother in law worked at the one in Boston).
But if we think about the ages that we were when certain life events occur, we don't remember much when we're young. I was 10 for the Challenger so I remember that. But I don't remember the Iranian hostage crisis as I was only 3. I don't remember Reagan or Lennon getting shot as I was only 4.
I've struggled going back and forth on whether or not to expose my kids to some of the horrors that are happening in today's very screwed up world. They do not know, to the best of my knowledge about the shooting at Sandy Hook. All I did was come home that night and hug them as tightly as I could. And we snuggled for a long time before they went to sleep. We have never talked about it.
As for yesterday, I don't believe they know either. The TV was definitely on while they were eating dinner, but they did not pay attention. They did not ask what happened, nor did I offer it up. Even though my son had someone running in the marathon for him as part of the Miles for Miracles program with Boston Children's Hospital, he still did not ask. We had been there at the finish line just 48 hour earlier.
Do I show them the video? Do I then teach them about what true evil looks like? Do I save their innocence, even if it's just for 1 day until the next evil comes along in some other form?
I brought them into work with me today. Really for no other reason than just to be with them. It seemed like a good day to do it. We had lunch together in the kitchen. They drew me pictures. It was nice.
My guess is in the future they would not remember what happened yesterday as they are only 5. And even if they did remember, they may not be able to process it completely now so their memory of it would be faint at best.
I think I'll leave it alone and hopefully they'll never know what evil really is.
For people who remember, they know where they were when JFK was shot. (Way before my time). They know where they were when the Challenger exploded. (I was in my classroom having recess because my teacher for whatever reason wouldn't let us watch. Another student barged in and told us what happened). They know where they were when 9/11 happened. (I was at work and when told that a plane had hit the WTC, I asked NY or Boston because I knew my mother in law worked at the one in Boston).
But if we think about the ages that we were when certain life events occur, we don't remember much when we're young. I was 10 for the Challenger so I remember that. But I don't remember the Iranian hostage crisis as I was only 3. I don't remember Reagan or Lennon getting shot as I was only 4.
I've struggled going back and forth on whether or not to expose my kids to some of the horrors that are happening in today's very screwed up world. They do not know, to the best of my knowledge about the shooting at Sandy Hook. All I did was come home that night and hug them as tightly as I could. And we snuggled for a long time before they went to sleep. We have never talked about it.
As for yesterday, I don't believe they know either. The TV was definitely on while they were eating dinner, but they did not pay attention. They did not ask what happened, nor did I offer it up. Even though my son had someone running in the marathon for him as part of the Miles for Miracles program with Boston Children's Hospital, he still did not ask. We had been there at the finish line just 48 hour earlier.
Do I show them the video? Do I then teach them about what true evil looks like? Do I save their innocence, even if it's just for 1 day until the next evil comes along in some other form?
I brought them into work with me today. Really for no other reason than just to be with them. It seemed like a good day to do it. We had lunch together in the kitchen. They drew me pictures. It was nice.
My guess is in the future they would not remember what happened yesterday as they are only 5. And even if they did remember, they may not be able to process it completely now so their memory of it would be faint at best.
I think I'll leave it alone and hopefully they'll never know what evil really is.
Monday, April 1, 2013
How to Diffuse a Tantrum
For centuries, as long as there have been children, there have been temper tantrums.. Actually, as long as there have been adults there have been temper tantrums too..
But the hard part is what to do once it happens.. You can see it coming too. They ask for the toy and you say no. First, they get really sad when they don't get what they want. With some kids you might even get that lip quiver trying to make you feel badly. Then they might hold their breath. And when all else fails, they start crying loudly and falling to the floor wailing. Then, the last step is to go boneless. It's really quite simple and depending on the parent, effective in getting what they want.
Except when you know how to diffuse a tantrum. Knowledge is power. Every parent is afraid of that situation when you are in public, perhaps at a supermarket or department store and the tantrum starts.
I have to say I cannot take credit for this. My wife is the one who came up with it.
When you see the tantrum start, follow these 3 easy steps to diffusing most tantrums:
1. Tell the child they are doing it wrong.
Huh? What are you talking about? Just trust me. Clearly the child will stop to look inquisitively at the parent trying to figure what they mean. Don't they understand that I am trying to throw a tantrum here?
2. Tell them how to do it properly. Show him that it's stomp, stomp, arm, arm and not arm, arm, stomp, stomp.
You will have the most bewildered child in the world at this point. Is my adult human really trying to tell me how to properly perform a temper tantrum? I'm the temper tantrum master don't they know this?
And then, when you have them all sorts of confused, lay the big one on:
3. Then, you flop down on the floor and flail!
Seriously, just do it. Your child will think that this is so funny and the best thing ever. Don't get me wrong, they will throw the tantrum, but they'll be LAUGHING while they do it.
Not only did you just change your child from crying to laughing in a matter of a minute, you just diffused a potentially embarrassing situation (especially if you are in a public place) and you didn't lose your temper yelling at your child.
While I can't guarantee success, I can say you have a much better chance of making a bad situation into a funny one. It seems to work with a 100% success rate in our house.
And as you are leaving the store, be sure to bow to the rounds of applause from the other parents. You will have earned it.
But the hard part is what to do once it happens.. You can see it coming too. They ask for the toy and you say no. First, they get really sad when they don't get what they want. With some kids you might even get that lip quiver trying to make you feel badly. Then they might hold their breath. And when all else fails, they start crying loudly and falling to the floor wailing. Then, the last step is to go boneless. It's really quite simple and depending on the parent, effective in getting what they want.
Except when you know how to diffuse a tantrum. Knowledge is power. Every parent is afraid of that situation when you are in public, perhaps at a supermarket or department store and the tantrum starts.
I have to say I cannot take credit for this. My wife is the one who came up with it.
When you see the tantrum start, follow these 3 easy steps to diffusing most tantrums:
1. Tell the child they are doing it wrong.
Huh? What are you talking about? Just trust me. Clearly the child will stop to look inquisitively at the parent trying to figure what they mean. Don't they understand that I am trying to throw a tantrum here?
2. Tell them how to do it properly. Show him that it's stomp, stomp, arm, arm and not arm, arm, stomp, stomp.
You will have the most bewildered child in the world at this point. Is my adult human really trying to tell me how to properly perform a temper tantrum? I'm the temper tantrum master don't they know this?
And then, when you have them all sorts of confused, lay the big one on:
3. Then, you flop down on the floor and flail!
Seriously, just do it. Your child will think that this is so funny and the best thing ever. Don't get me wrong, they will throw the tantrum, but they'll be LAUGHING while they do it.
Not only did you just change your child from crying to laughing in a matter of a minute, you just diffused a potentially embarrassing situation (especially if you are in a public place) and you didn't lose your temper yelling at your child.
While I can't guarantee success, I can say you have a much better chance of making a bad situation into a funny one. It seems to work with a 100% success rate in our house.
And as you are leaving the store, be sure to bow to the rounds of applause from the other parents. You will have earned it.
Monday, March 25, 2013
Twinny Twin Twin!!
New York City, 6p. Wendy Smith is boiling some water for dinner and accidentally burns her right hand. At the same time, across the country in Los Angeles, Wendy's twin sister Bonnie feels a sudden and sharp pain in her right hand. Coincidence?
Remember those? Whether you believe them or not, there is no doubt that twins is an interesting thing. There is absolutely an innate connection. While mine are fraternal (two separate eggs fertilized), they are still as close as identical. We saw 3D ultrasound pictures of them in the womb where they would be rubbing heads. And very often, after they came home, if we put them in the same crib to nap, they would end up with their heads touching, even though they didn't start that way. It also happens on the couch. They'll be sitting on the couch watching a movie, separated by maybe 1/3 of the couch. Sooner or later you just see them drift towards each other until they are right next to each and don't even realize it.
Sometimes I equate them to the aliens in one of my favorite 80s' movies, "Just One of the Guys". (I highly recommend it). There are these alien twins who appear at the school and cannot be separated. Check out this clip. Fast forward to about the 1 minute mark to see what I mean:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
I'm not saying it's always like this, but there are points where they need to be together. I swear there's nothing cuter than going into my twins' room and finding they are sleeping in the same bed. Only they don't always start that way. Clearly at some point one goes into the other's bed. Daniel has a full size bed and Douglas a twin. For a while they were sleeping in Daniel's bed and that was fine because there was enough room for both and as long as they slept, we didn't care. But lately, they've been wanting to sleep in Douglas's bed, which remember is only a twin. Now we all know how much room there is in a twin bed. More likely than not, many of you reading this have slept in one. Sometimes even with company. We all know it's not the most comfortable of night's sleep.
But really, who is it hurting? Well, I guess it's hurting Douglas because he woke up with a bloody nose the other morning. You know why? Because Daniel had hit him in the face while he flailed around in his sleep because there's NO ROOM FOR TWO PEOPLE IN A TWIN BED!
But we figure it's easier to let them grow out of the stage where they want to sleep in the same bed then force them to do anything that will produce the sound from this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
Remember those? Whether you believe them or not, there is no doubt that twins is an interesting thing. There is absolutely an innate connection. While mine are fraternal (two separate eggs fertilized), they are still as close as identical. We saw 3D ultrasound pictures of them in the womb where they would be rubbing heads. And very often, after they came home, if we put them in the same crib to nap, they would end up with their heads touching, even though they didn't start that way. It also happens on the couch. They'll be sitting on the couch watching a movie, separated by maybe 1/3 of the couch. Sooner or later you just see them drift towards each other until they are right next to each and don't even realize it.
Sometimes I equate them to the aliens in one of my favorite 80s' movies, "Just One of the Guys". (I highly recommend it). There are these alien twins who appear at the school and cannot be separated. Check out this clip. Fast forward to about the 1 minute mark to see what I mean:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
I'm not saying it's always like this, but there are points where they need to be together. I swear there's nothing cuter than going into my twins' room and finding they are sleeping in the same bed. Only they don't always start that way. Clearly at some point one goes into the other's bed. Daniel has a full size bed and Douglas a twin. For a while they were sleeping in Daniel's bed and that was fine because there was enough room for both and as long as they slept, we didn't care. But lately, they've been wanting to sleep in Douglas's bed, which remember is only a twin. Now we all know how much room there is in a twin bed. More likely than not, many of you reading this have slept in one. Sometimes even with company. We all know it's not the most comfortable of night's sleep.
But really, who is it hurting? Well, I guess it's hurting Douglas because he woke up with a bloody nose the other morning. You know why? Because Daniel had hit him in the face while he flailed around in his sleep because there's NO ROOM FOR TWO PEOPLE IN A TWIN BED!
But we figure it's easier to let them grow out of the stage where they want to sleep in the same bed then force them to do anything that will produce the sound from this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Let's Go Bruins!
So I try to get my boys to a Bruins game at least once a year. And hopefully they won't be scared this time like at the Worcester Sharks game where it might have been thought the mascot was a real shark. Yeah, I know..
But this year was interesting because of the lockout. They kept asking me if we were going to go to a Bruins game this year. Knowing they have no idea when the season starts or how long it is, I just kept saying that the season hadn't started yet, hoping to God the season started really soon because I was starting to really miss it. (And the questions were getting annoying)
I was able to get tickets to the game on February 9th. Yes, the day of the Super Blizzard. Alas, we did not get to go. We were all pretty disappointed so I said I would try to get tickets for another game. Thankfully, I was able to come through and my boys were very excited.
Saturday morning they got up and immediately put on their David Krecji jerseys and were very excited. Even though the game was at 1p and we were going to leave around 1115a, I told them they should take a nap in the car.
To one half of the Twinado I said "may I remind you what happened at Disney on Ice? I told you to take a nap and what did you say?" He replies with "NEVER"!!
"Yes, and what happened?"
"I was whiny and cranky and had to be taken out of the show."
Exactly.. I was NOT going to let that happen at an event I actually wanted to be at. Thankfully, they both did take naps and were well rested by the time we got to the Garden to pay $34 to park. Yes, that's right. $34. By contrast it was $10 at Disney on Ice. Same venue. Different 3rd party running the parking.
Other than keeping the Twinado from climbing the boards onto the ice, the big challenge at this game was going to be security. I don't know about anyone else's kids, but if there aren't snackies readily available for the #Twinado, we're going to have problems. But seeing as I already paid $34 for parking, I didn't have another $34 to feed the boys. So we took the chance of bringing snacks and drinks with us in a backpack. We had no problem getting in to Disney on Ice with it so we were hoping we did not have a problem. We go through the line and they ask my wife to step to the side so they can check her bag. A little nervous because we have had problems at Fenway with bags and also at the Garden previously. Not with snacks, just with bags in general. Thankfully, the guy just looked it at and had no problem and sent us through..
We got to our seats and they were very excited that the Bruins were practicing shooting at the net right in front of us. I took some time to explain some basic things to them. They obviously know the point of the game, but they started to understand power plays, the penalty box and were a little excited when the first fight happened. But so were the other 20K fans so I guess it's ok.. The intermissions were hard. They were good sitting there for the action (periodically asking if the Bruins had won and/or if it was over yet), but when there are 15 minutes or so of down time, it's a challenge. So we got up and walked around the arena and I showed them all the historical pictures and memorabilia that is placed around the Garden. That seemed to pass the time well and it also gave them a little glimpse into some Boston sports history, which is also nice.
The other problem with public events had been the noise level. Whether it be a sporting event, movie, etc the PA announcer or anything loud usually bothers them. I don't know if it's something to do with their prematurity that is just taking its time to mature or not, but I brought ear muffs for each of them and that seemed to sufficiently dull the noise so they were ok.
The third period was here and the Bruins were tied 2-2 after being down a quick 2-0. They had already eaten all their snackies as well as chicken fingers and fries and most of my wife's lunch. They were starting to get rambunctious and we were wondering how much longer they were going to be able to stay there. Thankfully they allowed us to separate them and hold them on our laps while we watched because with about 2 minutes left in the game, the Bruins scored and everyone went crazy!!!
They were very excited, but it was loud and the ear muffs weren't cutting it.. We did stay till the end of the game, but they were extremely happy to leave as they were passed out not long after exiting the garage.
All in all a good day at the Garden. Bruins won and everyone had fun. But the moral of the story is as always, if you're going anywhere with the #TwinsofAnarchy, make sure you bring plenty of snackies or you'll be sorry!
But this year was interesting because of the lockout. They kept asking me if we were going to go to a Bruins game this year. Knowing they have no idea when the season starts or how long it is, I just kept saying that the season hadn't started yet, hoping to God the season started really soon because I was starting to really miss it. (And the questions were getting annoying)
I was able to get tickets to the game on February 9th. Yes, the day of the Super Blizzard. Alas, we did not get to go. We were all pretty disappointed so I said I would try to get tickets for another game. Thankfully, I was able to come through and my boys were very excited.
Saturday morning they got up and immediately put on their David Krecji jerseys and were very excited. Even though the game was at 1p and we were going to leave around 1115a, I told them they should take a nap in the car.
To one half of the Twinado I said "may I remind you what happened at Disney on Ice? I told you to take a nap and what did you say?" He replies with "NEVER"!!
"Yes, and what happened?"
"I was whiny and cranky and had to be taken out of the show."
Exactly.. I was NOT going to let that happen at an event I actually wanted to be at. Thankfully, they both did take naps and were well rested by the time we got to the Garden to pay $34 to park. Yes, that's right. $34. By contrast it was $10 at Disney on Ice. Same venue. Different 3rd party running the parking.
Other than keeping the Twinado from climbing the boards onto the ice, the big challenge at this game was going to be security. I don't know about anyone else's kids, but if there aren't snackies readily available for the #Twinado, we're going to have problems. But seeing as I already paid $34 for parking, I didn't have another $34 to feed the boys. So we took the chance of bringing snacks and drinks with us in a backpack. We had no problem getting in to Disney on Ice with it so we were hoping we did not have a problem. We go through the line and they ask my wife to step to the side so they can check her bag. A little nervous because we have had problems at Fenway with bags and also at the Garden previously. Not with snacks, just with bags in general. Thankfully, the guy just looked it at and had no problem and sent us through..
We got to our seats and they were very excited that the Bruins were practicing shooting at the net right in front of us. I took some time to explain some basic things to them. They obviously know the point of the game, but they started to understand power plays, the penalty box and were a little excited when the first fight happened. But so were the other 20K fans so I guess it's ok.. The intermissions were hard. They were good sitting there for the action (periodically asking if the Bruins had won and/or if it was over yet), but when there are 15 minutes or so of down time, it's a challenge. So we got up and walked around the arena and I showed them all the historical pictures and memorabilia that is placed around the Garden. That seemed to pass the time well and it also gave them a little glimpse into some Boston sports history, which is also nice.
The other problem with public events had been the noise level. Whether it be a sporting event, movie, etc the PA announcer or anything loud usually bothers them. I don't know if it's something to do with their prematurity that is just taking its time to mature or not, but I brought ear muffs for each of them and that seemed to sufficiently dull the noise so they were ok.
The third period was here and the Bruins were tied 2-2 after being down a quick 2-0. They had already eaten all their snackies as well as chicken fingers and fries and most of my wife's lunch. They were starting to get rambunctious and we were wondering how much longer they were going to be able to stay there. Thankfully they allowed us to separate them and hold them on our laps while we watched because with about 2 minutes left in the game, the Bruins scored and everyone went crazy!!!
They were very excited, but it was loud and the ear muffs weren't cutting it.. We did stay till the end of the game, but they were extremely happy to leave as they were passed out not long after exiting the garage.
All in all a good day at the Garden. Bruins won and everyone had fun. But the moral of the story is as always, if you're going anywhere with the #TwinsofAnarchy, make sure you bring plenty of snackies or you'll be sorry!
Monday, January 28, 2013
Feeding
So I'll be switching gears a bit and delving into some tips for dads of twins.. I wish someone had been there to help me with these things along the way, but hey, sometimes you gotta just do it yourself and figure it out.
So we had a lot of feeding issues when the boys first came home (not to mention in the NICU). I mean, 45 minutes for one of them to take about 1-2 ounces, only to have them throw it all back up. Yeah, and at 2am it pretty much meant that life sucked.
So we invested in some bouncy seats, but they were more upright and we didn't utilize the bouncy function. We were sleep deprived, but not idiots.. So after feeding one, we would him hold upright for about 10 minutes and carefully burp hopeful not to bring up everything that was just consumed, if that was anything. Then, carefully put into the bouncy seat. This allowed the baby to be help upright as much as possible to help with digestion while we fed the other one. Then, when the 2nd one was done, we would switch them, wait another 10 minutes or so and then put the second one back in the crib.
It definitely worked.. It took a little more time overall, but it got better as time went on because they would be eating more and puking less as their stomachs grew. So if your twins (or singletons for that matter) have reflux issues, try holding upright for a bit after eating and then place in a more upright bouncy seat to let everything settle before putting back down flat in the crib. That will hopefully work as well for you as it did for us.
And this is not a one way street. If you have tips that you think other parents would benefit from, please feel free to post in the comments as the more information the better!
So we had a lot of feeding issues when the boys first came home (not to mention in the NICU). I mean, 45 minutes for one of them to take about 1-2 ounces, only to have them throw it all back up. Yeah, and at 2am it pretty much meant that life sucked.
So we invested in some bouncy seats, but they were more upright and we didn't utilize the bouncy function. We were sleep deprived, but not idiots.. So after feeding one, we would him hold upright for about 10 minutes and carefully burp hopeful not to bring up everything that was just consumed, if that was anything. Then, carefully put into the bouncy seat. This allowed the baby to be help upright as much as possible to help with digestion while we fed the other one. Then, when the 2nd one was done, we would switch them, wait another 10 minutes or so and then put the second one back in the crib.
It definitely worked.. It took a little more time overall, but it got better as time went on because they would be eating more and puking less as their stomachs grew. So if your twins (or singletons for that matter) have reflux issues, try holding upright for a bit after eating and then place in a more upright bouncy seat to let everything settle before putting back down flat in the crib. That will hopefully work as well for you as it did for us.
And this is not a one way street. If you have tips that you think other parents would benefit from, please feel free to post in the comments as the more information the better!
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Turkey for you..
So, Thanksgiving is over. I can honestly say I did not over eat. I guess I did something wrong then. But I did eat. I've been eating differently since my last kidney stone episode, but Thanksgiving is different. It's ok to let yourself go every once in a while.
Something I have always wanted to do as well, I did. I played football outside on Thanksgiving with my son. Daniel and I played for about half an hour and it was so much fun. My brother in law and his two kids were there too and everyone had a great time. Not to mention, the kid has quite an arm! And accurate too, somewhat.. While he did catch a few, we have to work on that. Maybe he'll just be a quarterback.
But what was missing was my wife and my other son. After the surgery, he needs to recuperate and can't do too much. Being with his brother and his cousins would have been too much stimulation for him. There is no way we would have been able to keep him grounded, literally. He would have been running and jumping and that would have been extremely detrimental to his recovery. So he had to stay home.
It was no fun celebrating Thanksgiving without my entire family. while I don't wish to do that again, I know that they were only 1 hour away. They were not half a world away. Please, everyone let's put our differences aside for just a minute to realize what we have.
Whenever we go to Children's Hospital, it is always the most humbling experience. Not only is it the best hospital in the world, but it always manages to put things in perspective. You literally are there in the lobby and you look to the left of you and see a child who is worse off than yours. Then you look to the right and you see another child worse off than the other one. Then you look at yours and you don't feel happy, you don't feel sad. You just feel thankful.
Let's all take a moment and be thankful for whatever it is you wish to be thankful for. But let's remember that for all our differences and for all its faults, we live in the greatest country that has ever existed. Let's be thankful for that.
Something I have always wanted to do as well, I did. I played football outside on Thanksgiving with my son. Daniel and I played for about half an hour and it was so much fun. My brother in law and his two kids were there too and everyone had a great time. Not to mention, the kid has quite an arm! And accurate too, somewhat.. While he did catch a few, we have to work on that. Maybe he'll just be a quarterback.
But what was missing was my wife and my other son. After the surgery, he needs to recuperate and can't do too much. Being with his brother and his cousins would have been too much stimulation for him. There is no way we would have been able to keep him grounded, literally. He would have been running and jumping and that would have been extremely detrimental to his recovery. So he had to stay home.
It was no fun celebrating Thanksgiving without my entire family. while I don't wish to do that again, I know that they were only 1 hour away. They were not half a world away. Please, everyone let's put our differences aside for just a minute to realize what we have.
Whenever we go to Children's Hospital, it is always the most humbling experience. Not only is it the best hospital in the world, but it always manages to put things in perspective. You literally are there in the lobby and you look to the left of you and see a child who is worse off than yours. Then you look to the right and you see another child worse off than the other one. Then you look at yours and you don't feel happy, you don't feel sad. You just feel thankful.
Let's all take a moment and be thankful for whatever it is you wish to be thankful for. But let's remember that for all our differences and for all its faults, we live in the greatest country that has ever existed. Let's be thankful for that.
DNC
No, nothing to do with politics.. This stands for DO NOT CATHETERIZE!
After spending roughly 48 hours with my son who had a catheter in, I'm all set thanks. Based on what I just had to do over the past 2 days, if it's necessary just forget it.
He did not move from my bed for almost 2 days. I had to pick him up every hour to empty the catheter so that it did not flow backwards. Additionally, he was upstairs in my bedroom while I was downstairs trying to do work. This obviously presented a problem.
I had what I thought was a genius idea of giving him a bell (small Liberty Bell we had) that he could ring if he needed me. His voice was still very hoarse from the breathing tube so this would work perfectly. I recall from my childhood there was a cartoon with the same premise. Someone who was sick was given a bell to use to signal when they needed something. Then the bell would ring and the person would come upstairs only to find their kitten had gotten hold of the bell and was playing with it like a ball of yarn. We don't have a kitten, but it was something like that. I found him one time just playing with it and not needing anything. Thankfully his voice got better as the day went on so the bell wasn't as necessary.
But still every hour, if I wasn't going up to change the show, movie or bring him food/drink, it was upstairs to empty the catheter tube. Then, overnight he slept with me in my bed where every 2-3 hours I had to do the same thing. Plus, I had to make sure that in his sleep he was not rolling over on either side so the catheter would stay in place. Needless to say, I have not slept much since Monday.
Then finally Wednesday came and the doctors appointment to have it removed. He has had a bladder tube before (a tube inserted directly into the bladder that diverts the flow from the urethra and out a tube so it allows the urethra to heal) and my role was to hold his torso down (mostly his arms) and make sure he is as calm as possible and not flailing his arms around. I had to do that twice and it was not fun. But it was fairly quick so it wasn't too bad. (FYI, the bladder tube also naturally causes bladder spasms. At one point I had to stand in the middle of the living room and hold him in the same position for two hours because it was the only position he could be in where it didn't hurt). Yep, the things we do.
This however was different. After keeping his arms down for a few minutes and after he screamed his face off right in mine, I told him not to worry they were almost done, only to hear the nurse say that they hadn't even started yet. UGH! It got to the point where he was spitting up (kind of like the spittle that sometimes leaks out of your mouth when you sleep with your mouth open), except in a much bigger puddle accompanied by screams of pain. Yeah, good times. By the end, he and I were both literally sweating. His head was drenched and I needed to take off my sweatshirt and was having trouble breathing. Remember, this is a kid on HGH. You know, the thing athletes take to make them stronger? Let me tell you, it really does work.
But once he calmed down and was home, he was fine. So he's resting comfortably on the couch now watching Power Rangers and we're doing our best to keep him limited in his activity. No running, jumping, straddling or any quick or sudden movements for 10 days. Yeah, have you met the Kraken?
After spending roughly 48 hours with my son who had a catheter in, I'm all set thanks. Based on what I just had to do over the past 2 days, if it's necessary just forget it.
He did not move from my bed for almost 2 days. I had to pick him up every hour to empty the catheter so that it did not flow backwards. Additionally, he was upstairs in my bedroom while I was downstairs trying to do work. This obviously presented a problem.
I had what I thought was a genius idea of giving him a bell (small Liberty Bell we had) that he could ring if he needed me. His voice was still very hoarse from the breathing tube so this would work perfectly. I recall from my childhood there was a cartoon with the same premise. Someone who was sick was given a bell to use to signal when they needed something. Then the bell would ring and the person would come upstairs only to find their kitten had gotten hold of the bell and was playing with it like a ball of yarn. We don't have a kitten, but it was something like that. I found him one time just playing with it and not needing anything. Thankfully his voice got better as the day went on so the bell wasn't as necessary.
But still every hour, if I wasn't going up to change the show, movie or bring him food/drink, it was upstairs to empty the catheter tube. Then, overnight he slept with me in my bed where every 2-3 hours I had to do the same thing. Plus, I had to make sure that in his sleep he was not rolling over on either side so the catheter would stay in place. Needless to say, I have not slept much since Monday.
Then finally Wednesday came and the doctors appointment to have it removed. He has had a bladder tube before (a tube inserted directly into the bladder that diverts the flow from the urethra and out a tube so it allows the urethra to heal) and my role was to hold his torso down (mostly his arms) and make sure he is as calm as possible and not flailing his arms around. I had to do that twice and it was not fun. But it was fairly quick so it wasn't too bad. (FYI, the bladder tube also naturally causes bladder spasms. At one point I had to stand in the middle of the living room and hold him in the same position for two hours because it was the only position he could be in where it didn't hurt). Yep, the things we do.
This however was different. After keeping his arms down for a few minutes and after he screamed his face off right in mine, I told him not to worry they were almost done, only to hear the nurse say that they hadn't even started yet. UGH! It got to the point where he was spitting up (kind of like the spittle that sometimes leaks out of your mouth when you sleep with your mouth open), except in a much bigger puddle accompanied by screams of pain. Yeah, good times. By the end, he and I were both literally sweating. His head was drenched and I needed to take off my sweatshirt and was having trouble breathing. Remember, this is a kid on HGH. You know, the thing athletes take to make them stronger? Let me tell you, it really does work.
But once he calmed down and was home, he was fine. So he's resting comfortably on the couch now watching Power Rangers and we're doing our best to keep him limited in his activity. No running, jumping, straddling or any quick or sudden movements for 10 days. Yeah, have you met the Kraken?
Monday, November 19, 2012
7th Time's a Charm?
So as I sit here in our personal section (or at least it seems that way) of the waiting area of Boston Children's Hospital (again), I'm reminded of the first time I sat here. It was exactly 5 years ago to the day and we were waiting anxiously to hear from the doctor about how the heart surgery had gone. We had gotten the news about 48 hours prior (as we were about to take him home for the third time) that Douglas's aorta narrowing had gotten worse. The two previous attempts to take him home were thwarted by last minute spikes in blood pressure (In hindsight, probably a good thing). It stemmed from an improper closing of the PDA valve after birth. This caused a narrowing in his aorta making it extremely hard for the blood to flow. Because he was so small, probably only about 5 pounds or so at this point, his heart was working overtime just to pump the blood normally but was working double overtime because of the narrowing. This was causing his blood pressure to spike even more. They told us if they did not operate to remove the blockage in 72 hours, his heart would literally explode.
Now you would think that news like this would be so devastating to new parents that they would break down uncontrollably and cry. But after the last 10 weeks of what we and the boys had been through, this was pretty much par for the course (and should have been a sign of things to come). Long story short, the procedure went flawlessly, his blood pressure is stellar and the annual EKG's have all been fun actually since he gets to play with all the stickers on his body.
But I've come to the realization that the old saying is true: That which doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Because this kid is the strongest 5 year old I know and if he can get through all of this in his first 5+ years of life, he can get through anything that life will throw at him. I love him more than he'll ever know.
Now you would think that news like this would be so devastating to new parents that they would break down uncontrollably and cry. But after the last 10 weeks of what we and the boys had been through, this was pretty much par for the course (and should have been a sign of things to come). Long story short, the procedure went flawlessly, his blood pressure is stellar and the annual EKG's have all been fun actually since he gets to play with all the stickers on his body.
But I've come to the realization that the old saying is true: That which doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Because this kid is the strongest 5 year old I know and if he can get through all of this in his first 5+ years of life, he can get through anything that life will throw at him. I love him more than he'll ever know.
Monday, September 10, 2012
The Day
For anyone who knows me, I have pretty much been the same weight since I
graduated college.. There was this uptick of about 10 pounds my senior
year from 150 to 160, but I honestly have no idea why.. Must have just
been a fluke; you know, one of those things..
Anyway, I've been hovering around 150 for the better part of almost 15 years now (ugh, has it really been almost 15 years since I graduated college?) and I've been able to eat pretty much anything I wanted.. It's a gift you know? It's like I can't control it. (Anyone who's seen The Girl Next Door knows that line). My metabolism, thanks to my grandfather, helped me out with that.. Truth be told, I've always been pretty active, but I've slowed down a bit in recent years.. With a full time job and the Twinado, my nights of playing indoor soccer have disappeared and my days of pick up hoop games with friends have waned into non-existence. Don't get me wrong, chasing the boys around, playing at the park with them or even taking the dog for a walk is good exercise, just not to the level I'm used to.
However I had an epiphany recently, or maybe it was a hallucination from the excruciating pain I was feeling while enduring my third kidney stone in the last 8 years.. I have no idea why God picked me to have these, but oh I am so thankful!! I used to think that you're never given anything you can't handle (see previous blogs), but seriously this isn't even funny. My first one was in 2004 when living in Smallbany, NY. I would write a blog about that, but we weren't even there long enough for anything interesting to happen.. Oh, except for all of our belongings being stolen by the movers, but that's another blog for another day I guess..
So, the real point of this blog (if you're still reading) is that for the first time in my life, I'm on a diet.Well, it's not really a diet I guess, just trying to cut sodium. You would not believe the sodium content in some things.. I'm not saying that too much sodium will kill you, but there are lots of things that we eat that can have lasting effects on our health I'm not here to preach don't worry. But my point is in addition to the fact I have no want at all to relive the pain of another kidney stone, I do have the want to see my sons grow up. . These last 5 years have totally changed me. But it doesn't have to be just kids. It can be parents, grandparents, siblings, grandchildren, whomever. It doesn't matter who as long as it's someone. I'm not saying don't enjoy life, I'm just saying make sure you make it last a long time. And while I don't want to go too crazy, I will if I have to. Because I think it's worth it.
Anyway, I've been hovering around 150 for the better part of almost 15 years now (ugh, has it really been almost 15 years since I graduated college?) and I've been able to eat pretty much anything I wanted.. It's a gift you know? It's like I can't control it. (Anyone who's seen The Girl Next Door knows that line). My metabolism, thanks to my grandfather, helped me out with that.. Truth be told, I've always been pretty active, but I've slowed down a bit in recent years.. With a full time job and the Twinado, my nights of playing indoor soccer have disappeared and my days of pick up hoop games with friends have waned into non-existence. Don't get me wrong, chasing the boys around, playing at the park with them or even taking the dog for a walk is good exercise, just not to the level I'm used to.
However I had an epiphany recently, or maybe it was a hallucination from the excruciating pain I was feeling while enduring my third kidney stone in the last 8 years.. I have no idea why God picked me to have these, but oh I am so thankful!! I used to think that you're never given anything you can't handle (see previous blogs), but seriously this isn't even funny. My first one was in 2004 when living in Smallbany, NY. I would write a blog about that, but we weren't even there long enough for anything interesting to happen.. Oh, except for all of our belongings being stolen by the movers, but that's another blog for another day I guess..
It was in the middle of the night and it was pain unlike I had
ever experienced before.. I had never really had any type of pain
experience like that so I wasn't sure what to expect. Of course, Amy
wasn't feeling well that night so she had taken the red devil (NyQuil)
so she could sleep. So there she is in her NyQuil coma and I am
writhing around in pain on the floor thinking something is going to
burst through my side like in Alien (yes, I know, that was his chest but
your kidney's aren't in your chest now are they?)
Thankfully my wailing eventually woke her with
obviously no clue as to what was happening. Not knowing the area too
well, or really what was going on, 911 was the best course of action.
While the ambulance is on its way I thought I could make it to the
door. It is the middle of the night, in February, in Albany so it's not
exactly balmy out. Somehow I have clothes on when the paramedics
arrive. I thought I could crawl the length of the hallway from our
bedroom in the back of the apartment to the front door, which in
retrospect isn't that long, but seemed like one of those never-ending
hallways. Well, I didn't make it.. I collapsed somewhere between the
end of our bedroom and the beginning of the kitchen, which was probably a
total of 5 feet. They had to put me on one of those chairs that keeps
you in a tuck position because the pain of having to straighten my body
was unbearable. Amy followed along in her car while the ambulance drove
to the hospital which was about 5-10 minutes away. I do remember them
hooking me up to the IV and giving me morphine for the pain. I remember
them saying "
OK 5 cc's of morphine" and administering it. Then they ask you, if
you've never been in an ER or ambulance for a pain-related emergency,
"describe the pain from 1-10?" So I said 20! OK, I'll let you in on a
little secret here.. I don't deal with pain well.. I mean, a cut on my
finger, or s stub on the toe, big deal.. but real, actual pain? Nope..
So they gave me another 5 cc's of morphine. After a minute or two, they
asked me again and I think I said 15. So yes, they gave me 5 more cc's
of morphine and then I was floating. I was done. No more pain. No
more anything really.. The relief was the best thing I had ever felt..
Until it wore off at some point in the hospital so they gave me a prescription for Vicodin. While at CVS filling
my prescription for Vicodin, the pharmacist asked me what it was for as
it was heavy medication. I told her it was for a kidney stone and she
said, and I quote" I have had 3 children by vaginal birth and I
have had 1 kidney stone. I would gladly have 3 more children by vaginal
birth than have another kidney stone." Fan-tas-tic. Now make with the
Vicodin before the one I took wears of..
Unfortunately, I did not pass it so I had to sit on
the couch for a few days and in between popping Vicodin drink those 24
oz sport bottles of Poland Spring and pee every 5 minutes into a
strainer to hopefully pass a stone that was about half the size of a
grain of rice, if that.. Tons of fun let me tell you..
The second one, of course in the middle of the night
again was not as bad as before the ambulance even arrived I was already
starting to feel better.. It didn't mean I wasn't in pain and didn't
gladly accept the morphine they were giving me, it just didn't hurt as
much for as long the second time. However, circumstances had changed
because we had 2 very young children and in the middle of the night, it
just wasn't going to be possible to have Amy and the boys follow me. So
after I was released, the ER called me a cab and yes, I took a cab home
from the hospital. Only, I didn't have any money and had to plead with
the guy to take me home explaining my situation. I was praying that we
had some cash at home to give him and thankfully, we had just enough.
Sorry dude, no tip this time.. Maybe next time..
And yes, there was a next time.. For the kidney
stone, not the cab thankfully.. But of course, the middle of the night
(there has to be something to this) and there it is again.. Agony.. After already having had two of them, I knew exactly what the pain was. So we
pack up the boys in the car and drive to the ER. Toridal and Dilaudid
this time around, which did the trick.. We were only there for a few
hours and still was able to get a few more hours sleep on Saturday
morning.. However, we were planning on going with some friends to Davis
Farmland which had already been postponed once for the weather. It was
the boys' birthday weekend and I didn't want to miss it. So I perc'd
up and it was pretty fun actually..
So, the real point of this blog (if you're still reading) is that for the first time in my life, I'm on a diet.Well, it's not really a diet I guess, just trying to cut sodium. You would not believe the sodium content in some things.. I'm not saying that too much sodium will kill you, but there are lots of things that we eat that can have lasting effects on our health I'm not here to preach don't worry. But my point is in addition to the fact I have no want at all to relive the pain of another kidney stone, I do have the want to see my sons grow up. . These last 5 years have totally changed me. But it doesn't have to be just kids. It can be parents, grandparents, siblings, grandchildren, whomever. It doesn't matter who as long as it's someone. I'm not saying don't enjoy life, I'm just saying make sure you make it last a long time. And while I don't want to go too crazy, I will if I have to. Because I think it's worth it.
Thursday, August 9, 2012
Reflection
This blog is usually pretty light-hearted, but unfortunately sometimes I need to be serious.
Everyone has problems and/or issues with their kids.. No one's child is perfect (although we all like to believe so). Trust me, I know. Medical issues started with my kids while they were still in the womb! Some children have difficulty eating, some have chronic illnesses, learning disabilities, and other issues that we believe are so awful that we become so stressed about them and they start to take over our daily lives. Not to make light of anything (I never would), but in many ways a lot of these issues are manageable whether via medicine, therapy or just good old fashioned time where the child will grow out of whatever it is.
However I heard some news yesterday about a friend's daughter that really threw me for a loop. Losing a child is quite possibly the worst thing I can think of right now. I don't know what I would do.
Thankfully they are persevering with help from friends, family and loved ones and coping the best they can with this obviously unimaginable tragedy.
So the next time you find yourself complaining about your child's issues whether it be not pooping in the potty, having trouble walking, or anything else, know that it more often than not will get better. The reason is because each day is another opportunity.
Now go hug your kids and tell them you love them.
Everyone has problems and/or issues with their kids.. No one's child is perfect (although we all like to believe so). Trust me, I know. Medical issues started with my kids while they were still in the womb! Some children have difficulty eating, some have chronic illnesses, learning disabilities, and other issues that we believe are so awful that we become so stressed about them and they start to take over our daily lives. Not to make light of anything (I never would), but in many ways a lot of these issues are manageable whether via medicine, therapy or just good old fashioned time where the child will grow out of whatever it is.
However I heard some news yesterday about a friend's daughter that really threw me for a loop. Losing a child is quite possibly the worst thing I can think of right now. I don't know what I would do.
Thankfully they are persevering with help from friends, family and loved ones and coping the best they can with this obviously unimaginable tragedy.
So the next time you find yourself complaining about your child's issues whether it be not pooping in the potty, having trouble walking, or anything else, know that it more often than not will get better. The reason is because each day is another opportunity.
Now go hug your kids and tell them you love them.
Monday, April 2, 2012
Independence Day
I don't get it.. The kid that is able to do everything, yet doesn't.. Douglas is that kid.. I know positively 100% that this kid can do everything I am asking him to do in order to be more self-sufficient and he just picks and chooses.. Ridiculously frustrating.
Perhaps I got a glimpse into the mind of the Kraken the other tonight. After staying up late to watch a movie (9p), they went up to brush their teeth and go to sleep. Takes no time at all and I'm downstairs. About 25 minutes later Douglas is asking for some water. So I actually go upstairs reluctantly and help him instead of asking him to do it himself (which I know he can do). I didn't want to wake Daniel up. So I give him the cup and he stands on the step stool.
I said, can you turn this on? And at first he said no (but not just a regular no it was that drawn out 7 syllable no that seems like it lasts an eternity).. But, I figured he is so tired I I would try asking him again and, be-grudgingly he said, yeah.. But it wasn't just a regular yeah.. It was the "I'm so disappointed in myself because now he's on to me" kind of yeah... He then proceeds to turn on the faucet and fill his cup all by himself.
Well did I just get a glimpse into the mind of the Kraken and is he starting to break? Or is he just messing with my head a la Stewie Griffin? I sure hope it's the former because I can't deal with all those song and dance numbers..
Perhaps I got a glimpse into the mind of the Kraken the other tonight. After staying up late to watch a movie (9p), they went up to brush their teeth and go to sleep. Takes no time at all and I'm downstairs. About 25 minutes later Douglas is asking for some water. So I actually go upstairs reluctantly and help him instead of asking him to do it himself (which I know he can do). I didn't want to wake Daniel up. So I give him the cup and he stands on the step stool.
I said, can you turn this on? And at first he said no (but not just a regular no it was that drawn out 7 syllable no that seems like it lasts an eternity).. But, I figured he is so tired I I would try asking him again and, be-grudgingly he said, yeah.. But it wasn't just a regular yeah.. It was the "I'm so disappointed in myself because now he's on to me" kind of yeah... He then proceeds to turn on the faucet and fill his cup all by himself.
Well did I just get a glimpse into the mind of the Kraken and is he starting to break? Or is he just messing with my head a la Stewie Griffin? I sure hope it's the former because I can't deal with all those song and dance numbers..
Monday, February 20, 2012
Name Game
Sitting in the pediatrician's office the other day I was reading a magazine. You know one of those magazines that says they're for parents but really the only time they mention a dad is when they are telling them what to get the mom as a gift for what a wonderful job she does raising their child all by herself with no help from him.. But I digress, that's a blog for another day..
So there I am reading letters that parents (moms) have written in with stories about how their wonderful child's name came to be.. I mean some of these were ridiculous.. One person wrote about how they named their son Reef because they were avid scuba divers and loved the ocean. Another couple named their daughter Azure because she was conceived on a picnic blanket underneath a clear azure sky..
Really people? What ever happened to naming your child the old conventional way? After movie characters.. When we were told we might be having 2 boys and not a boy and a girl we quickly had to come up with a second boy name.. At this point we were both dazed and confused about everything going on and since that's one of our favorite movies, we decided a name from that movie would work well. And it's even more fitting he's got this creepy Wooderson laugh.. Alright, alright, alright...
So there I am reading letters that parents (moms) have written in with stories about how their wonderful child's name came to be.. I mean some of these were ridiculous.. One person wrote about how they named their son Reef because they were avid scuba divers and loved the ocean. Another couple named their daughter Azure because she was conceived on a picnic blanket underneath a clear azure sky..
Really people? What ever happened to naming your child the old conventional way? After movie characters.. When we were told we might be having 2 boys and not a boy and a girl we quickly had to come up with a second boy name.. At this point we were both dazed and confused about everything going on and since that's one of our favorite movies, we decided a name from that movie would work well. And it's even more fitting he's got this creepy Wooderson laugh.. Alright, alright, alright...
Monday, January 30, 2012
When Life Gives You Lemons: Part 3
This is where the movie part ends. There were no flowers or cards or cigars. I sat alone in my room for a couple of hours, but it seemed like an eternity. Unable to see my wife or my children I had no idea what was going on. Occasionally a nurse would come in and ask if I needed anything like water, etc.. While it was appreciated, it certainly wasn't going to help. It was the middle of the night, well technically now very early in the morning so we weren't going to call anybody. We had already made the decision that evening on the way to the hospital that if we did have the babies that we would wait until the morning to call and not have any one come that day. It was going to be hectic enough without having people around to ask questions we just didn't know the answers to.
Finally I was able to see my wife which was nice.. She had done such a great job. I was so proud of her. But we were so concerned about the health of the babies that we really had no time to think about anything else. Because they were so premature, born at 28 weeks and 1 day, they were immediately moved to the NICU (Neo-natal Intensive Care Unit) where they would be hooked up to more wires and tubes than I would ever see in my entire life. You couldn't even see their little bodies as they were all covered with gauze, wires, tubes and numerous other devices that were helping them stay alive. They even had little blindfolds over their eyes to shield them from the bright lights of the NICU and their isolettes. One funny thing though, the diapers they were wearing, because they were so small were called WeePees. I couldn't make that up if I tried. That's what they're called.. Pretty funny..
As I mentioned, we were originally told we were having a boy and a girl. Then, at about week 24 or so, we were told to stop telling people that. Then, after delivery, we were told we had a boy and a girl again. So we guessed the original genders were correct. However they were telling us not to say anything to anyone about the sexes until we had a conversation with the doctors. We were ushered into a conference room and suddenly were standing in front of about 12 doctors and specialists. We had a feeling this was not going to be your normal conversation.
We could not have been more right. They proceeded to tell us the reason why they could not give us the gender of one of the babies. It had been born with a chromosomal genetic abnormality called Mosaic Turner Syndrome. A chromosome analysis test called a karyotype determined the diagnosis. Some of the characteristics of Mosaic Turner Syndrome are short stature, a high palate making it difficult to eat, coarctation of the aorta, and ambiguous genitalia (the baby had all 4). When the babies' chromosomes were replicating, early on there was a mistake. A genetic abnormality if you will. One of the X chromosomes did not pair up with a Y, it was left blank. That mistake replicated all the way down so the baby only had 15% XY and 85% XO. Therefore, we had a decision to make. We had to decide the gender of our child. Was the baby going to be a boy or a girl?
Now there are some decisions a person makes that defines who they are going to be. For example, what college you go to or don't go to, what job you take or don't take, who you date and perhaps eventually who you do or do not marry. However there are very few decisions that one makes that defines their life. This would be an decision that defined mine.
We met with teams of doctors including genetic specialists, endocrinologists, urologists, among others. Tests were run and it was concluded that the baby was in fact making testosterone, however was not making enough. Based on the absence of any female indicators and all signs pointing to male indicators, the decision was made that the baby would be a boy. Because the normal reproductive system had not fully developed, numerous surgeries would need to be performed in order to create a functioning reproductive system. These would happen over the next few years.
Now that the decision was made, it was time to name the babies. We had already had 1 boy name picked out because we knew were having at least 1 boy. However when we were told to stop telling people we were having a girl, we knew we should have a second boy name just in case. Thus, Daniel and Douglas were officially named and soon became household names.
This is by far not the end of the story as this is the ever-evolving tale of the Twins of Anarchy. But writing this particular blog was quite cathartic for me as I've told the story before, but never put it down on "paper". I do wish I had started this back when I found out we were having twins. Well, there's always next time.. Eh, I don't think so. :)
Finally I was able to see my wife which was nice.. She had done such a great job. I was so proud of her. But we were so concerned about the health of the babies that we really had no time to think about anything else. Because they were so premature, born at 28 weeks and 1 day, they were immediately moved to the NICU (Neo-natal Intensive Care Unit) where they would be hooked up to more wires and tubes than I would ever see in my entire life. You couldn't even see their little bodies as they were all covered with gauze, wires, tubes and numerous other devices that were helping them stay alive. They even had little blindfolds over their eyes to shield them from the bright lights of the NICU and their isolettes. One funny thing though, the diapers they were wearing, because they were so small were called WeePees. I couldn't make that up if I tried. That's what they're called.. Pretty funny..
As I mentioned, we were originally told we were having a boy and a girl. Then, at about week 24 or so, we were told to stop telling people that. Then, after delivery, we were told we had a boy and a girl again. So we guessed the original genders were correct. However they were telling us not to say anything to anyone about the sexes until we had a conversation with the doctors. We were ushered into a conference room and suddenly were standing in front of about 12 doctors and specialists. We had a feeling this was not going to be your normal conversation.
We could not have been more right. They proceeded to tell us the reason why they could not give us the gender of one of the babies. It had been born with a chromosomal genetic abnormality called Mosaic Turner Syndrome. A chromosome analysis test called a karyotype determined the diagnosis. Some of the characteristics of Mosaic Turner Syndrome are short stature, a high palate making it difficult to eat, coarctation of the aorta, and ambiguous genitalia (the baby had all 4). When the babies' chromosomes were replicating, early on there was a mistake. A genetic abnormality if you will. One of the X chromosomes did not pair up with a Y, it was left blank. That mistake replicated all the way down so the baby only had 15% XY and 85% XO. Therefore, we had a decision to make. We had to decide the gender of our child. Was the baby going to be a boy or a girl?
Now there are some decisions a person makes that defines who they are going to be. For example, what college you go to or don't go to, what job you take or don't take, who you date and perhaps eventually who you do or do not marry. However there are very few decisions that one makes that defines their life. This would be an decision that defined mine.
We met with teams of doctors including genetic specialists, endocrinologists, urologists, among others. Tests were run and it was concluded that the baby was in fact making testosterone, however was not making enough. Based on the absence of any female indicators and all signs pointing to male indicators, the decision was made that the baby would be a boy. Because the normal reproductive system had not fully developed, numerous surgeries would need to be performed in order to create a functioning reproductive system. These would happen over the next few years.
Now that the decision was made, it was time to name the babies. We had already had 1 boy name picked out because we knew were having at least 1 boy. However when we were told to stop telling people we were having a girl, we knew we should have a second boy name just in case. Thus, Daniel and Douglas were officially named and soon became household names.
This is by far not the end of the story as this is the ever-evolving tale of the Twins of Anarchy. But writing this particular blog was quite cathartic for me as I've told the story before, but never put it down on "paper". I do wish I had started this back when I found out we were having twins. Well, there's always next time.. Eh, I don't think so. :)
Monday, January 23, 2012
When Life Gives You Lemons: Part 2
It started like any other.. A nice day to go with your dad to the ballpark to watch the hometown team.. I knew I wasn't going to have many more chances to do that so I wanted to get it in while I could. My dad and I enjoyed a great day at Fenway on the Sunday of Labor Day weekend 2007. My wife, completing her 28th week was just as happy to relax on the bed with the dog and sleep.
We both went to sleep fairly early that night knowing we both had the day off the next day for Labor Day. Plus, it was a long day for me traveling to Boston, the game and getting back. Even though it's only an hour away, an hour back and the game was 3 hours it turned into an all day thing.. Always does. I can honestly say it was one of the most sound sleeps I had been in in a long time. And then, around 1am, poke poke..
"Um, honey, I think I'm having contractions".
"Huh?" Oh, ok I'll get the watch and the paper. Having finished the birthing class about 2 weeks earlier, I knew what my role was. We time contractions for about 30 minutes and they are all over the place. My wife just doesn't feel right and wants to call the doctor which was fine. She calls the local hospital which is affiliated with our hospital in Boston and who does she get? The one doctor out of the 6 she had seen that she didn't like. That doctor wanted us to come to the closer hospital. When my wife asked what would happen if she needed to deliver (remember she just finished her 28th week) the doctor said well they would deliver there and then send the babies to Boston. So when she tried to confirm that we would just follow the ambulance after, the answer was no, you'll stay here.. Well, then that was a big fat no thanks.. we'll just go to Boston. It's 2am and I'm sure there won't be any traffic.. we'll take our chances..
So I quickly packed a bag (thankfully) and we started off to Boston. Unfortunately, the only way we knew that time to go was Route 9, which is ALWAYS under construction.. So someone who was having contractions and had to drive in a car going over unevenly paved road with exposed sewer caps, she was less than thrilled.
They say it never happens like it does in the movies.. I'm calling shenanigans.. that's EXACTLY the way it happens.. We pull up into the emergency zone, and I get her out of the car screaming, "I need a wheelchair and a doctor!" We wheel her into the hospital and fill out endless forms before we can enter.. We finally get brought into an area to get checked out by a doctor. While my wife is being tended to, I'm being asked a whole host of questions.. I think I answered all of them, I really don't know.. I do know the nurse was very impressed I knew her social security number (my wife's, not the nurses. That would be have awkward). Then, I heard a doctor say "I can feel a head. we need to get you the delivery room stat!" Ok, I don't know if she said stat, but I'm keeping with the whole movie theme.. They literally threw scrubs at me and pointed me to a bathroom to go change and meet them outside.
Do you remember the scene in Pulp Fiction after Vincent Vega's date with Mia Wallace where he's in the bathroom contemplating whether he should sleep with her or not all while she's OD'ing on the super crank he had in his jacket? That was kinda the scene here where I'm getting ready with these scrubs asking myself in the mirror if this is really happening or is it a dream.. How could they be here already we still have 3 months before they're supposed to be born, we're not ready, we don't have anything, etc.. While it seemed like an hour it was probably only a minute or so. I came out of the bathroom to an empty hallway. No one. I thought that can't be good.
Finally I find someone that said my wife needed to be taken to the ER immediately and they couldn't wait. I got directed where to go and by the time I got there, they had already closed the doors and unfortunately, I was not allowed to enter. So once again, like in the movies, I am sitting there in the hallway pacing around by myself wondering what was going on. Then, like an angel I hear a familiar voice, "Ben?" Now, my wife always complains that I know someone wherever we go. I ran into a fraternity brother on the plane to Hawaii for our honeymoon for example. There isn't a sporting event, concert or random place we go to that I don't see someone I know. However, this time I think she would be happy.
"Kristin?" It was an old friend of mine from growing up who happened to be working that night and was heading into the ER where my wife was giving birth. It was her job to make sure that once born the babies airways were clear and they were breathing well. Let me tell you, not being allowed to be in that room was the worst feeling ever. After hearing about everyone else's experiences being in the delivery room, being together, taking pictures and video, to know I wasn't going to get to do that was deflating. I knew these were the only children we would have which means I will never get to experience it. A hole that will always be vacated.
We both went to sleep fairly early that night knowing we both had the day off the next day for Labor Day. Plus, it was a long day for me traveling to Boston, the game and getting back. Even though it's only an hour away, an hour back and the game was 3 hours it turned into an all day thing.. Always does. I can honestly say it was one of the most sound sleeps I had been in in a long time. And then, around 1am, poke poke..
"Um, honey, I think I'm having contractions".
"Huh?" Oh, ok I'll get the watch and the paper. Having finished the birthing class about 2 weeks earlier, I knew what my role was. We time contractions for about 30 minutes and they are all over the place. My wife just doesn't feel right and wants to call the doctor which was fine. She calls the local hospital which is affiliated with our hospital in Boston and who does she get? The one doctor out of the 6 she had seen that she didn't like. That doctor wanted us to come to the closer hospital. When my wife asked what would happen if she needed to deliver (remember she just finished her 28th week) the doctor said well they would deliver there and then send the babies to Boston. So when she tried to confirm that we would just follow the ambulance after, the answer was no, you'll stay here.. Well, then that was a big fat no thanks.. we'll just go to Boston. It's 2am and I'm sure there won't be any traffic.. we'll take our chances..
So I quickly packed a bag (thankfully) and we started off to Boston. Unfortunately, the only way we knew that time to go was Route 9, which is ALWAYS under construction.. So someone who was having contractions and had to drive in a car going over unevenly paved road with exposed sewer caps, she was less than thrilled.
They say it never happens like it does in the movies.. I'm calling shenanigans.. that's EXACTLY the way it happens.. We pull up into the emergency zone, and I get her out of the car screaming, "I need a wheelchair and a doctor!" We wheel her into the hospital and fill out endless forms before we can enter.. We finally get brought into an area to get checked out by a doctor. While my wife is being tended to, I'm being asked a whole host of questions.. I think I answered all of them, I really don't know.. I do know the nurse was very impressed I knew her social security number (my wife's, not the nurses. That would be have awkward). Then, I heard a doctor say "I can feel a head. we need to get you the delivery room stat!" Ok, I don't know if she said stat, but I'm keeping with the whole movie theme.. They literally threw scrubs at me and pointed me to a bathroom to go change and meet them outside.
Do you remember the scene in Pulp Fiction after Vincent Vega's date with Mia Wallace where he's in the bathroom contemplating whether he should sleep with her or not all while she's OD'ing on the super crank he had in his jacket? That was kinda the scene here where I'm getting ready with these scrubs asking myself in the mirror if this is really happening or is it a dream.. How could they be here already we still have 3 months before they're supposed to be born, we're not ready, we don't have anything, etc.. While it seemed like an hour it was probably only a minute or so. I came out of the bathroom to an empty hallway. No one. I thought that can't be good.
Finally I find someone that said my wife needed to be taken to the ER immediately and they couldn't wait. I got directed where to go and by the time I got there, they had already closed the doors and unfortunately, I was not allowed to enter. So once again, like in the movies, I am sitting there in the hallway pacing around by myself wondering what was going on. Then, like an angel I hear a familiar voice, "Ben?" Now, my wife always complains that I know someone wherever we go. I ran into a fraternity brother on the plane to Hawaii for our honeymoon for example. There isn't a sporting event, concert or random place we go to that I don't see someone I know. However, this time I think she would be happy.
"Kristin?" It was an old friend of mine from growing up who happened to be working that night and was heading into the ER where my wife was giving birth. It was her job to make sure that once born the babies airways were clear and they were breathing well. Let me tell you, not being allowed to be in that room was the worst feeling ever. After hearing about everyone else's experiences being in the delivery room, being together, taking pictures and video, to know I wasn't going to get to do that was deflating. I knew these were the only children we would have which means I will never get to experience it. A hole that will always be vacated.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
When Life Gives You Lemons: Part 1
I can't stand that expression.. It's not always so easy to just "make lemonade" out of lemons. Sometimes life gives you something for which you are not prepared, nor could you ever be. I would put having twins up there at the top, at least for me.
On April 2nd, 2007 we went to my wife's doctor for a check up. We saw the nurse who was performing the ultrasound. As we watched the computer monitor, she nonchalantly said "so, you know you're having twins".. I can't even put a question mark at the end of that sentence because in reality, it was not a question. She was thinking she was confirming something we already knew. Oh she could not have been more wrong.. The shocked expression on our faces was something out of a horror movie where the soon to be victim just realized the killer was inside the house..
"Wait, what?" I asked? Being April 2nd, where the previous day was April Fools Day, I of course asked "this isn't some belated April Fools joke is it? Because if it is, it's not really that funny".
The nurse then said, "oh no, see that little dot right there? That's Baby A and then see that little dot right over there? That's Baby B".
I will be honest.. The first thing that went through my head was not excitement; it was a dollar sign. Thousands of them. 2 mouths to feed, 2 kids in diapers, 2 kids in daycare, 2 Bar Mitzvah's!!! I really don't recall when it set in.. Not sure it truly has.
The next few months which should have been full of joy, shopping and excitement were some of the longest months of my life chock full of doctor's appointments. I feel like that's all we did. Doctor after doctor and test after test. With my wife not being very big (5 feet or so) and carrying twins, obviously the doctors wanted to monitor her closely. Oh, and the fact that she had had multiple back surgeries, including 2 spinal fusions, didn't exactly help matters.
Then, at about 20 weeks or so we had an appointment. The ultrasound revealed a two-vessel cord on Baby B (Normal would be 3 vessels). Baby B also had a distended stomach. Now either of these things alone is no real cause for alarm. However the two characteristics together can be a marker of certain birth defects such as Down Syndrome. The doctor then tells us that we should seriously start thinking about considering selective reduction. And yes, it's exactly what it sounds like. While an amniocentesis could potentially confirm a diagnosis, at this point it would be too dangerous for the healthy twin and it would not 100% confirm anything. So really, we had nothing to gain from doing the procedure and everything to lose.
She says she would like to see us next week to discuss, but we were going away to North Carolina for vacation, our last before the kids. We tell her we are going away and then she tells us she is on vacation the following week so she can see us when she gets back. What? We're supposed to now have this life-altering decision weighing on us for 3 weeks, including our vacation? She seemed very indifferent to the situation and saw no immediacy in a resolution. I guess in retrospect we could have canceled our vacation but the stress of the situation was really baring down on us and we needed this break for whatever sanity we had left. Regardless of what your beliefs may be, when faced with that type of decision it is not as easy as you think. You start weighing things you never thought you would weigh, speak words you never thought you would speak. But after some discussion, the decision was clear. Already knowing we would not be selectively reducing the twins, we decided it might be best not to go back to that doctor and start seeing one in Boston where the twins would be born. Though it would be a much longer drive and require more time for appointments, we felt it would be well worth it in the long run, and we were right.
We saw this fantastic doctor at a hospital in Boston and were told we were having a boy and a girl. We were elated! 1 of each and we're done? Oh this was great, we could not have been happier.. We had names picked out and everything.. Then a few weeks later, at another ultrasound (which seemed to be a weekly occurrence) the doctor asked "what did I tell you that you were having"? We told her she had said a boy and a girl.. And the doctor said something I will never forget "Um, you may want to stop telling people you're having a girl". Wait, what? The reason for the confusion was that Baby B was not cooperating very well in opening its legs so even a 4D ultrasound (which I HIGHLY recommend if you can, very cool) could not determine the gender for sure. Another reason was that there was a possibility of the fetus having ambiguous genitalia. One could understand the lack of confidence in the gender with these two factors.
More doctors and more meetings with geneticists, urologists, counselors and on and on and on it seemed.. The doctors also wanted us to rethink having an amnio. We believed it was more to satisfy their curiosity about the gender of the babies. However, the cons far outweighed the pros. There was no guarantee that the amnio would be 100% and there was a good possibility that the healthy baby could move, puncturing its sack and sending my wife into early labor. That was certainly not an option (at least at this point).
On April 2nd, 2007 we went to my wife's doctor for a check up. We saw the nurse who was performing the ultrasound. As we watched the computer monitor, she nonchalantly said "so, you know you're having twins".. I can't even put a question mark at the end of that sentence because in reality, it was not a question. She was thinking she was confirming something we already knew. Oh she could not have been more wrong.. The shocked expression on our faces was something out of a horror movie where the soon to be victim just realized the killer was inside the house..
"Wait, what?" I asked? Being April 2nd, where the previous day was April Fools Day, I of course asked "this isn't some belated April Fools joke is it? Because if it is, it's not really that funny".
The nurse then said, "oh no, see that little dot right there? That's Baby A and then see that little dot right over there? That's Baby B".
I will be honest.. The first thing that went through my head was not excitement; it was a dollar sign. Thousands of them. 2 mouths to feed, 2 kids in diapers, 2 kids in daycare, 2 Bar Mitzvah's!!! I really don't recall when it set in.. Not sure it truly has.
The next few months which should have been full of joy, shopping and excitement were some of the longest months of my life chock full of doctor's appointments. I feel like that's all we did. Doctor after doctor and test after test. With my wife not being very big (5 feet or so) and carrying twins, obviously the doctors wanted to monitor her closely. Oh, and the fact that she had had multiple back surgeries, including 2 spinal fusions, didn't exactly help matters.
Then, at about 20 weeks or so we had an appointment. The ultrasound revealed a two-vessel cord on Baby B (Normal would be 3 vessels). Baby B also had a distended stomach. Now either of these things alone is no real cause for alarm. However the two characteristics together can be a marker of certain birth defects such as Down Syndrome. The doctor then tells us that we should seriously start thinking about considering selective reduction. And yes, it's exactly what it sounds like. While an amniocentesis could potentially confirm a diagnosis, at this point it would be too dangerous for the healthy twin and it would not 100% confirm anything. So really, we had nothing to gain from doing the procedure and everything to lose.
She says she would like to see us next week to discuss, but we were going away to North Carolina for vacation, our last before the kids. We tell her we are going away and then she tells us she is on vacation the following week so she can see us when she gets back. What? We're supposed to now have this life-altering decision weighing on us for 3 weeks, including our vacation? She seemed very indifferent to the situation and saw no immediacy in a resolution. I guess in retrospect we could have canceled our vacation but the stress of the situation was really baring down on us and we needed this break for whatever sanity we had left. Regardless of what your beliefs may be, when faced with that type of decision it is not as easy as you think. You start weighing things you never thought you would weigh, speak words you never thought you would speak. But after some discussion, the decision was clear. Already knowing we would not be selectively reducing the twins, we decided it might be best not to go back to that doctor and start seeing one in Boston where the twins would be born. Though it would be a much longer drive and require more time for appointments, we felt it would be well worth it in the long run, and we were right.
We saw this fantastic doctor at a hospital in Boston and were told we were having a boy and a girl. We were elated! 1 of each and we're done? Oh this was great, we could not have been happier.. We had names picked out and everything.. Then a few weeks later, at another ultrasound (which seemed to be a weekly occurrence) the doctor asked "what did I tell you that you were having"? We told her she had said a boy and a girl.. And the doctor said something I will never forget "Um, you may want to stop telling people you're having a girl". Wait, what? The reason for the confusion was that Baby B was not cooperating very well in opening its legs so even a 4D ultrasound (which I HIGHLY recommend if you can, very cool) could not determine the gender for sure. Another reason was that there was a possibility of the fetus having ambiguous genitalia. One could understand the lack of confidence in the gender with these two factors.
More doctors and more meetings with geneticists, urologists, counselors and on and on and on it seemed.. The doctors also wanted us to rethink having an amnio. We believed it was more to satisfy their curiosity about the gender of the babies. However, the cons far outweighed the pros. There was no guarantee that the amnio would be 100% and there was a good possibility that the healthy baby could move, puncturing its sack and sending my wife into early labor. That was certainly not an option (at least at this point).
Monday, December 19, 2011
The Perfect Day
Boys, it's time to get up! The Daniel and Douglas 500 has begun!!
Both kids hop out of bed with the anticipation of a great day ahead. They go potty all by themselves, including washing and drying their hands completely. They both handle getting dressed with no issues or whining, including those pesky socks. They head back into the bathroom to brush their teeth themselves. Now I'm starting to get curious.
They head downstairs and get bagels for breakfast. I help them spread the cream cheese and pour the milk. They eat and chat with no problems or spills. After they're finished they bring their plates and cups into the kitchen and put them in the dishwasher. Now I'm starting to get intrigued.
They then put on their sneakers and I help them tie their shoes (they are still 4 after all). They put on their coats (including zippers), gloves and hats and get into the car. They buckle themselves in with no problems. Now I'm starting to get worried.
I make it to school right on time. They unbuckle themselves, grab their lunches from the front seat and head into school. They hang up their jackets on the proper hooks and put their lunches away. They give a cursory wave and say goodbye daddy as they dive into some legos.
I come home from work and the boys are already quietly eating dinner. After dinner it's upstairs and into the bath. There's no whining, no fighting, they willingly go into the bath and play. No problems washing and getting them into pajamas and all ready for bed. We read a few books and then they climb into bed, cover themselves and are out as soon as their heads hit the pillows. We shut the door and quietly say good night, but they are already asleep.
We look at each other in amazement and wonder if this was in fact the perfect d..
EH! EH! EH! EH! EH! EH! EH! EH! SMACK!!!
Oh, it's 6am already? I shut off my alarm realizing that the perfect day was all a dream.
Ladies and Gentle-cars! It's time for today's Daniel and Douglas 500!!!
Boys, Start Your Engines!!!
Douglas : "Va-Roooooooooooom"!!!
Daniel : "Ugh".. Proceeds to roll over..
Yeah, that's more like it.
Both kids hop out of bed with the anticipation of a great day ahead. They go potty all by themselves, including washing and drying their hands completely. They both handle getting dressed with no issues or whining, including those pesky socks. They head back into the bathroom to brush their teeth themselves. Now I'm starting to get curious.
They head downstairs and get bagels for breakfast. I help them spread the cream cheese and pour the milk. They eat and chat with no problems or spills. After they're finished they bring their plates and cups into the kitchen and put them in the dishwasher. Now I'm starting to get intrigued.
They then put on their sneakers and I help them tie their shoes (they are still 4 after all). They put on their coats (including zippers), gloves and hats and get into the car. They buckle themselves in with no problems. Now I'm starting to get worried.
I make it to school right on time. They unbuckle themselves, grab their lunches from the front seat and head into school. They hang up their jackets on the proper hooks and put their lunches away. They give a cursory wave and say goodbye daddy as they dive into some legos.
I come home from work and the boys are already quietly eating dinner. After dinner it's upstairs and into the bath. There's no whining, no fighting, they willingly go into the bath and play. No problems washing and getting them into pajamas and all ready for bed. We read a few books and then they climb into bed, cover themselves and are out as soon as their heads hit the pillows. We shut the door and quietly say good night, but they are already asleep.
We look at each other in amazement and wonder if this was in fact the perfect d..
EH! EH! EH! EH! EH! EH! EH! EH! SMACK!!!
Oh, it's 6am already? I shut off my alarm realizing that the perfect day was all a dream.
Ladies and Gentle-cars! It's time for today's Daniel and Douglas 500!!!
Boys, Start Your Engines!!!
Douglas : "Va-Roooooooooooom"!!!
Daniel : "Ugh".. Proceeds to roll over..
Yeah, that's more like it.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Behind the Bag
October 25th, 1986. I had turned 10 that summer and it was a fantastic summer.. I had gone to overnight camp for the first time in a little slice of heaven up in Brookline, NH. My sister had gone the year before for a month, but she said wasn't for her. My parents said try it one more time and this time your brother will go too. After the first month, visiting day came for the kids who stayed all summer and it was changeover day for the kids who only went one month. When my parents came up to get us, they asked my sister how it was and she said she didn't want to go back. I then promptly said "can I have her month?" I loved it so much I wanted to go the entire summer.. I remember vividly waiting not so patiently every morning that July for a counselor or camper to have a Boston Globe (back when people read the Globe) so I could see how the Red Sox did the night before. My camp saying in the yearbook was actually "So how did the Red Sox do last night?" I guess I was a little obsessed.
But in 1986, what 10 year old wasn't? Hell, what 40 year old wasn't? Boston sports in 1986 was something to witness. The Celtics had just finished wrapping up their 16th World Championship by dispatching the Houston Rockets in 6 games (FYI, 85-86 Celtics best TEAM ever. Ever.) The Patriots had made their impossible run to their first Super Bowl the season prior (let's just say they scored the first 3 points of the game and the last 7. Who really remembers giving up 46 in between?) I also had my first beer during that game. Coors Gold. Mmm, Coors Gold... Lastly, the Bruins had unfortunately lost to the hated Habs in 7 games in the Adams Division Semis (back when there were real divisions, none of this Eastern Conference/Western Conference crap. Wales and Campbell dammit!)
But the Red Sox were different. Boston was still a baseball town first and the hometown 9 hadn't won a World Series since.. well, you know when, I don't need to say it.. They had come close many times before my time (1946, 1967, 1975). But this team was great. Clemens, Hurst, Boggs, Rice, Evans..
I mean these guys were so good. I thought it was over though when they were down 3-1 to the California Angels before they became the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim and then became the Anaheim Angels I believe before finally settling on.. oh I don't even know.. I remember hoping Dave Henderson would somehow just get on base in Game 5 to keep the season alive. He had gone 2 for 4 to that point and my sister and I were chanting "2 for 4 let's make it 3 for 5".. You're really creative when your 10 and 14, huh? And then somehow Hendu launched one over the wall and the Sox would go on to win the series and face the Mets in the World Series. (RIP Donnie Moore)
Fast forward to Game 6. Heading into the 10th the Sox scored 2 runs to make it 5-3. 1 out. 2 outs. Hell 1 STRIKE AWAY! (wait, I don't have to give that perm-head any royalties for using that do I? Boston folks, you know who I mean) And then, it was like a dam overflowed and the levees broke and it just all fell apart. For the record, I do not blame Buckner. Never have. Well, maybe at that specific moment I did, but once I was old enough to analyze everything, I didn't. He should have never been in there to begin with. All playoffs McNamara had put in Dave Stapleton as a defensive replacement. It's what you do in the playoffs. Why not now when it means the most? I didn't get it then and I still don't get it now. But I digress..
We all know what happened.. Until 2004 when the Red Sox finally won it all (thank you Joe Buck for ruining it) Game 6 was all anybody could talk about regarding the Red Sox, that and that stupid "curse" (more royalties).. And 2007 thankfully put it all to bed. But some people still don't forgive Buckner. I don't get that either. Would I be this calm if the Sox hadn't won it in 04 and/or 07? Perhaps not. But I still wouldn't blame Buckner. He has made peace with it a lot sooner than some locals have. He finally got up the nerve to come to Boston and throw out the first pitch at Fenway and received a raucous standing ovation that lasted easily over 5 minutes. I didn't think he was going to make it to actually throwing the pitch. He was clearly moved by the ovation and I think it finally hit him that people were over it.
For a while it didn't bother me to watch it. In fact, there were times after 04 that I would go back and watch it just to prove it didn't bother me anymore. But after this most recent monumental collapse, the turmoil that is the front office and who knows what to make of the on-field product, it gives me that feeling again.
October 25th, 2011. It was time for a bath. I had asked the boys numerous times to come upstairs, to no avail (nothing new there). The bath was ready and the water was starting to get cold. Finally I come downstairs to turn off Super Hero Squad and what happened to be on was E:60 doing some sort of retrospective of the 25 year anniversary of The Error. So of course, I had to sit. Suddenly, I was mesmerized. It was pre-2004 all over again. And since the boys love the Red Sox, they were watching. I said "boys, I hope you never have to go through the agony of what I went through watching this game".. They had no idea what I was talking about. And as they show the replay over and over and over and over and over, I was like seriously people!!! How many times can you show a 5 second clip in 1 minute? Well the answer evidently is 12.. (for those of you who need a math refresher, get a calculator).
Well, apparently Mitch had had enough as well because he said "daddy, it's time to turn it off now". Yes Mitch, it certainly is.
But in 1986, what 10 year old wasn't? Hell, what 40 year old wasn't? Boston sports in 1986 was something to witness. The Celtics had just finished wrapping up their 16th World Championship by dispatching the Houston Rockets in 6 games (FYI, 85-86 Celtics best TEAM ever. Ever.) The Patriots had made their impossible run to their first Super Bowl the season prior (let's just say they scored the first 3 points of the game and the last 7. Who really remembers giving up 46 in between?) I also had my first beer during that game. Coors Gold. Mmm, Coors Gold... Lastly, the Bruins had unfortunately lost to the hated Habs in 7 games in the Adams Division Semis (back when there were real divisions, none of this Eastern Conference/Western Conference crap. Wales and Campbell dammit!)
But the Red Sox were different. Boston was still a baseball town first and the hometown 9 hadn't won a World Series since.. well, you know when, I don't need to say it.. They had come close many times before my time (1946, 1967, 1975). But this team was great. Clemens, Hurst, Boggs, Rice, Evans..
I mean these guys were so good. I thought it was over though when they were down 3-1 to the California Angels before they became the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim and then became the Anaheim Angels I believe before finally settling on.. oh I don't even know.. I remember hoping Dave Henderson would somehow just get on base in Game 5 to keep the season alive. He had gone 2 for 4 to that point and my sister and I were chanting "2 for 4 let's make it 3 for 5".. You're really creative when your 10 and 14, huh? And then somehow Hendu launched one over the wall and the Sox would go on to win the series and face the Mets in the World Series. (RIP Donnie Moore)
Fast forward to Game 6. Heading into the 10th the Sox scored 2 runs to make it 5-3. 1 out. 2 outs. Hell 1 STRIKE AWAY! (wait, I don't have to give that perm-head any royalties for using that do I? Boston folks, you know who I mean) And then, it was like a dam overflowed and the levees broke and it just all fell apart. For the record, I do not blame Buckner. Never have. Well, maybe at that specific moment I did, but once I was old enough to analyze everything, I didn't. He should have never been in there to begin with. All playoffs McNamara had put in Dave Stapleton as a defensive replacement. It's what you do in the playoffs. Why not now when it means the most? I didn't get it then and I still don't get it now. But I digress..
We all know what happened.. Until 2004 when the Red Sox finally won it all (thank you Joe Buck for ruining it) Game 6 was all anybody could talk about regarding the Red Sox, that and that stupid "curse" (more royalties).. And 2007 thankfully put it all to bed. But some people still don't forgive Buckner. I don't get that either. Would I be this calm if the Sox hadn't won it in 04 and/or 07? Perhaps not. But I still wouldn't blame Buckner. He has made peace with it a lot sooner than some locals have. He finally got up the nerve to come to Boston and throw out the first pitch at Fenway and received a raucous standing ovation that lasted easily over 5 minutes. I didn't think he was going to make it to actually throwing the pitch. He was clearly moved by the ovation and I think it finally hit him that people were over it.
For a while it didn't bother me to watch it. In fact, there were times after 04 that I would go back and watch it just to prove it didn't bother me anymore. But after this most recent monumental collapse, the turmoil that is the front office and who knows what to make of the on-field product, it gives me that feeling again.
October 25th, 2011. It was time for a bath. I had asked the boys numerous times to come upstairs, to no avail (nothing new there). The bath was ready and the water was starting to get cold. Finally I come downstairs to turn off Super Hero Squad and what happened to be on was E:60 doing some sort of retrospective of the 25 year anniversary of The Error. So of course, I had to sit. Suddenly, I was mesmerized. It was pre-2004 all over again. And since the boys love the Red Sox, they were watching. I said "boys, I hope you never have to go through the agony of what I went through watching this game".. They had no idea what I was talking about. And as they show the replay over and over and over and over and over, I was like seriously people!!! How many times can you show a 5 second clip in 1 minute? Well the answer evidently is 12.. (for those of you who need a math refresher, get a calculator).
Well, apparently Mitch had had enough as well because he said "daddy, it's time to turn it off now". Yes Mitch, it certainly is.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Twinado
I love my boys.. I really do.. but I'm not going to lie when I say I sometimes look forward to Sunday nights..
See normally people would say, huh? Don't you have to work the next day? Isn't the next day Monday, etc, etc? But see it's different in my house.. Ever since the boys started daycare in January of 2008 someone has been watching them on Mondays.. It's either been my mom, my father in law, my mother in law, my sister in law.. you get the point..
But this specific weekend it was a little much.. My wife is in a mothers of multiples group and they have a tag sale every 6 months. You tag and sell clothes that don't fit, toys they don't play with anymore, books they don't read, etc. So it's been work all week, take care of the boys at night, then sort and tag till we go to bed, which has been late every night. Then Friday night she had to set up so it was just us boys. No problem. Then, after getting home late Friday, it was up early Saturday for her to be at the sale by 6am. So it was just me and the boys again.. Normally it would be no problem..
We did some errands and then we went to an indoor playground. Of course Mitch goes right for the house and puts on an apron and starts cooking.. He never cooks at home, but get him out of the house and he becomes Bobby Flay. Max tried desperately to play in the house with him, but being my OCD child he wanted the door closed. However the door wouldn't close and 3 times he got his fingers stuck in the hinges.. I guess if at first you don't succeed, try till you cut your fingers off. Then, they were having shopping cart races (I guess I might be at fault for that one from the Target parking lot). But since Mitch is a little, shall we say undersized, he was going too fast and went over the handle and into the cart.. This woman watched this in horror and tried to help him out while I sat there laughing.. I know, bad parenting at its best.. But it was pretty funny.. He of course was OK, I knew. But at that point it had been a couple of hours I figured it was time to go home for lunch.
I had to feed them and then get them in a bath because once my wife got home she had to get ready as we were going to a work function for her office. So I get them into the bath no problem, but then Mitch decides to poop while in the bath.. Of course he does.. then it's drain the bath, get everyone out and fill it back up, etc.. Totally didn't need that.. Then, we head to the work function which was 45 minutes and we were 2 hours late. Of course the boys were so pleasant when we got there.. It took about 40 minutes for them to finally warm up. We ended up getting home at 8p from that which was not fun.
Sunday we had the Children's Hospital Miracle Maker Reception in Natick at 11am. That was no problem except we had a birthday part to get to in Stow at 1p. We started leaving the reception around 1245p and made it to the party around 130p. This is only because you had to take a train to the parking lot of the farm and the train had about as good a schedule as the MBTA. Somehow we managed to get it all in and we were home around 3p. That's when the sugar kicked in.. All over the place with running and jumping and toys, wrestling, etc.. I don't know where they get all this energy all the time.. it's not like they have cake all the time..
By the time halftime of the Patriots game rolled around, I was done. Thankfully my mother in law was there around 4 and helped entertain them. By 6p the Twinado had passed over the house and was on its way to its grandparents house for the night. But it left in its wake toys everywhere, food all over the place and the house in total disarray. I think I found the dog huddled over in the corner shaking..
Like I said, I love my boys, but sometimes I just can't wait for Sunday night.
See normally people would say, huh? Don't you have to work the next day? Isn't the next day Monday, etc, etc? But see it's different in my house.. Ever since the boys started daycare in January of 2008 someone has been watching them on Mondays.. It's either been my mom, my father in law, my mother in law, my sister in law.. you get the point..
But this specific weekend it was a little much.. My wife is in a mothers of multiples group and they have a tag sale every 6 months. You tag and sell clothes that don't fit, toys they don't play with anymore, books they don't read, etc. So it's been work all week, take care of the boys at night, then sort and tag till we go to bed, which has been late every night. Then Friday night she had to set up so it was just us boys. No problem. Then, after getting home late Friday, it was up early Saturday for her to be at the sale by 6am. So it was just me and the boys again.. Normally it would be no problem..
We did some errands and then we went to an indoor playground. Of course Mitch goes right for the house and puts on an apron and starts cooking.. He never cooks at home, but get him out of the house and he becomes Bobby Flay. Max tried desperately to play in the house with him, but being my OCD child he wanted the door closed. However the door wouldn't close and 3 times he got his fingers stuck in the hinges.. I guess if at first you don't succeed, try till you cut your fingers off. Then, they were having shopping cart races (I guess I might be at fault for that one from the Target parking lot). But since Mitch is a little, shall we say undersized, he was going too fast and went over the handle and into the cart.. This woman watched this in horror and tried to help him out while I sat there laughing.. I know, bad parenting at its best.. But it was pretty funny.. He of course was OK, I knew. But at that point it had been a couple of hours I figured it was time to go home for lunch.
I had to feed them and then get them in a bath because once my wife got home she had to get ready as we were going to a work function for her office. So I get them into the bath no problem, but then Mitch decides to poop while in the bath.. Of course he does.. then it's drain the bath, get everyone out and fill it back up, etc.. Totally didn't need that.. Then, we head to the work function which was 45 minutes and we were 2 hours late. Of course the boys were so pleasant when we got there.. It took about 40 minutes for them to finally warm up. We ended up getting home at 8p from that which was not fun.
Sunday we had the Children's Hospital Miracle Maker Reception in Natick at 11am. That was no problem except we had a birthday part to get to in Stow at 1p. We started leaving the reception around 1245p and made it to the party around 130p. This is only because you had to take a train to the parking lot of the farm and the train had about as good a schedule as the MBTA. Somehow we managed to get it all in and we were home around 3p. That's when the sugar kicked in.. All over the place with running and jumping and toys, wrestling, etc.. I don't know where they get all this energy all the time.. it's not like they have cake all the time..
By the time halftime of the Patriots game rolled around, I was done. Thankfully my mother in law was there around 4 and helped entertain them. By 6p the Twinado had passed over the house and was on its way to its grandparents house for the night. But it left in its wake toys everywhere, food all over the place and the house in total disarray. I think I found the dog huddled over in the corner shaking..
Like I said, I love my boys, but sometimes I just can't wait for Sunday night.
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